How We Play Chess: You Don’t Wanna Trade Queens With Me

extracted from the justice/how we play chess combo post on Wednesday-ish

While I – as citizen of the world – came on here to write the grand, world-altering legal theory of a lifetime; I –  as Serene – was distracted by capitalization and instead now first want to write first about “how we play chess.”

There’s also “how we solve Rubik’s Cube,” but I have yet to introduce that as a disconnected tag or inside joke that appears “apropos of nothing” and yet actually has both literal meaning and quite a bit of unadulterated fun both in terms of story value and — and, perhaps most importantly —  real life applicability for regular people. Okay, well, maybe not “regular” people, but regular, very intelligent people.

Yes, boys and girls, if you are one of the many real people out there in the world afflicted with Limitless Intelligence Syndrome or are either a card carrying member of the Intentional and Consensual Mindfuckers Organization, a devotee to their belief system, or even a person with a still closeted mindfuck fetish, we welcome you.

This is for you.

How We Play Chess

In actuality, it’s quite simple, really. The story of how it started is good but as my mind has wandered again, it doesn’t look like I’ll get to it here.

(Yes, I am one highly annoying bitch. Cute, though.)

The basic idea usually begins like it did with us – although as most good ideas, the genesis of it was really accidental – and that is by a single-order change in the objective of the game: in our case that objective shifted from putting the King in “checkmate” to putting the Queen in mate. No other rules were changed. So The Bitch – as I refer to the most awesome and powerful goddess of the chess board – still can move in exactly the same amazing ways as before, and the King is still limited as before, and everything else stays the same – but the objective shifts to going after The Bitch. Oh, as a natural consequence one other corresponding change is made; whether you choose to view it as making my original statement of a single-order change incorrect or not depends on you, but the King may be taken prisoner as the Queen was before and the Queen may not be taken but is instead required to free herself from the many and myriad entanglements of check that she so necessarily finds herself in, just as the King is required to do in the regular rules of the game.

And that, really, is what makes it so much fun and so radically changes the game.

Now, go play chess.

(Aw hell, now that I’ve more fully delineated the issue of How We Play Chess, watch this 2 and ½ minute clip again.)

“The Nerdy Looking Kid In the White Shirt”

One Comment Add yours

  1. I still actually watch the damn clip ~ a-fucking-gain ~ every time I pass this stupid ass post.

    AND I’m reposting “uncool” again because it is the best scene in the entire world.

    You know, sometimes.

    Thank god for art.

    Like

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