That’s just how I am and I think you should know that about me

My feet look hilarious in this. So, you’re welcome.

When you came out of the bar yesterday and I was doing an extra-loud, extra-energetic:

I love you I hate you I’m on the fence it all depends whether I’m up I’m down I’m on the mend transcending all reality I like you despise you admire you what are we gonna do when everything all falls through? I must confess I’ve made a mess of what should be a small success but I digress at least I’ve tried my very best I guess

I was, in fact, inflicting emotional pain on Dak because she was being bratty. (That is her name for this purpose.) She embarrasses easily — now — but I predict she’ll be cured of that affliction in no time. It made me happy to see you. It helped her to believe me. I tried to tell her that everyone expects me to act like a fool on these streets. That’s the me they know and love. Or at least mostly love. But nobody even comes close to having heard me say/scream that stupid song more than you. I told her that too, but it seemed she figured that part out on her own.

I’ve become attached to the idea it’s all a shifting dream bittersweet philosophy I’ve go no idea how I even got here I’m resentful I’m having an existential time crisis what bliss? Daylight savings won’t fix this mess underworked and oversexed I must express my disinterest directed back inside my head what would Freud have said?

It worked, by the way. It put her in a better mood and made her forget all her touchiness. I think I’ll try that method with you some time.

I’m a fake I’m a phony I’m awake I’m alone I’m homely I’m a Scorpio!

So, do you like what I’ve done with the binocular case?

You don’t have to sign in to comment, you know? I think you should step out into the big wide world with me. Leave a comment telling me how long you think I should wait before showing this to Dak?

I’m just going to write everything on here. Fuck it. It’ll be the internet equivalent of going outside in my bathrobe. (Now that would really embarrass Dak. I should totally do that.)